I know you're not here, on this site or even in this world, and you're not the slightest bit concerned with posts made on Facebook, but I wrote this for you October 19, exactly a month before you were called home. It's been less than 16 hours and I'm being overstimulated with all the new realities that are beginning to set in. I wish I could've seen your face when you entered glory. I love knowing that you'll get to see mine. I miss you Travis. I don't think this post will make me feel better, but maybe it can be a showcase of who we are together to a couple who isn't sure of how great they can be.
October 19, 2015
“And the next thing we knew, they all had flown off, and to this day that lake is somewhere over Georgia.”
I’m watching Fried Green Tomatoes. You’re coughing and turned away from me on the bed, and I’m sitting in the rocking chair next to you, grading papers. I love this chair. I took care of our babies from this chair. And I’m taking care of you from it, too. Maybe I should call it the Take Care Chair. Only one other person left to take care of from this chair.
This chair. This chair. I don't want to have to be next in this chair.
I watch the blankets on our bed rise and fall with each of your sweet breaths. You are obsessing over containers for your salts. You do that from time to time. Obsess. You’ll get online and search and research and pore over reviews. It drives me nuts, but I know if there ever comes a day when you’re not here, I will miss those endless nights of googling.
I love you, Travis Tinnin. I don’t want to do all, or any of this without you. Who will talk me off the ledge when I start to sweat the small stuff? Who will teach Thurgood to never quit and Tallulah not to walk through a door that’s not being opened for her? Who will stay up late talking about life’s mysteries with me? Who will laugh at those inappropriate jokes and made up song lyrics that I would only share with you? No one else in the world would laugh hysterically about a role reversal for The Little Drummer Boy. You make me better. You make me wiser. You make me stronger. I love and live so much better.
God is using you to show me who He is, to show me His turnaround power. He uses you to love on me, to encourage me, to strengthen me. You are my easiest victory and my greatest challenge. I knew I had you from the moment I met you. I am fighting every day to keep you.
Ephesians 5:25
October 19, 2015
“And the next thing we knew, they all had flown off, and to this day that lake is somewhere over Georgia.”
I’m watching Fried Green Tomatoes. You’re coughing and turned away from me on the bed, and I’m sitting in the rocking chair next to you, grading papers. I love this chair. I took care of our babies from this chair. And I’m taking care of you from it, too. Maybe I should call it the Take Care Chair. Only one other person left to take care of from this chair.
This chair. This chair. I don't want to have to be next in this chair.
I watch the blankets on our bed rise and fall with each of your sweet breaths. You are obsessing over containers for your salts. You do that from time to time. Obsess. You’ll get online and search and research and pore over reviews. It drives me nuts, but I know if there ever comes a day when you’re not here, I will miss those endless nights of googling.
I love you, Travis Tinnin. I don’t want to do all, or any of this without you. Who will talk me off the ledge when I start to sweat the small stuff? Who will teach Thurgood to never quit and Tallulah not to walk through a door that’s not being opened for her? Who will stay up late talking about life’s mysteries with me? Who will laugh at those inappropriate jokes and made up song lyrics that I would only share with you? No one else in the world would laugh hysterically about a role reversal for The Little Drummer Boy. You make me better. You make me wiser. You make me stronger. I love and live so much better.
God is using you to show me who He is, to show me His turnaround power. He uses you to love on me, to encourage me, to strengthen me. You are my easiest victory and my greatest challenge. I knew I had you from the moment I met you. I am fighting every day to keep you.
Ephesians 5:25
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